Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
To be honest I don't know what's worse, the fact that I interupted their shower sex or the fact that I was so drunk I used the adjoining stall anyway
I swear, if he gets me a bowling ball for Christmas, I will throw it at him.
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
OMG HE JUST PUKED WITH THE DOOR OPEN WHILE DRIVING ON THE ROAD AND OMG WE NEED TO CHAT BUT NOT ATM CAUSE THERES PUKE ON MY PHONE
You said your face felt like it was made out out of boxes and kept asking me to give you a bath.
So far in the last ten minutes I have tried to pour cereal into a plate. Today's gonna be a great day.
I woke up with a stapler in my ass. Don't even complain to me.
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
You know, you could always move. Lol somewhere without gators, water moccasins, and Marco Rubio.
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
It’s a good thing I’m the only one in the office today. My boy toy stopped by and now there is jiz all over my desk and couch
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