i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
Babe! I just farted and I swear to jesus lord christ that it sounded like ur name! Ok, more like Meeatt but still... awesome.
If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
i know we're in college but you cant booty call me at 3 in the afternoon. i dont care how drunk you are.
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
I just had to explain to my grandma what a reach-around is. Too far..
Sorry again for almost setting you on fire.
Nothing says girls night like wine cheese and pregnancy tests 😂
So if your sore it's because you tried to tackle a tree last night. When I told you at the party, you said "What do you expect, I'm an athlete!"
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