why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
she looked like the bat from fern gully.
Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
I need a creepy friend to scare off the other creepy people
I would be honored to be that friend.
Just whacked off in the middle of writing a paper, gave me great ideas. Note, should do this more often.
turns out making maccaroni and cheese with whipped cream instead of butter is only good when your high
You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
The best was having to tell my 16y/o cuz and her bf that we could see him fingering her in the inner tube. Lucky for them, I'm the cool cousin... and was river-level fuckedup.
Dude I broke my bong in half this morning. I kicked it as I was jerking off. I would never hide anything from you.
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
It's nights like those I refer to my life motto: You can't be just friends with someone after you've seen their genitals.
I told him I'd clean his cock if he ever sent my GF another text message. It was a horrific time for me to miss the l key on my iPhone.
Yeah I don't remember how I got home last night
Judging from my pants, I embarrassed myself smh
chicken nuggets make me a bit homicidal
He wrote his entire dissertation last night. I can only imagine the frightening amount of headway he would make if he ever did things sober.
Randomize
