well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
So this shipmate of mine somehow managed to throw up in his back pocket.
I already brushed my teeth, and it's not even noon yet. Today's going to be a productive day.
I hit a bug from across the room with my flip flop boomerang style. That awesome.
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
For my job application I just put "community gardener- personal business" for my previous work experience in place of the neighborhood pot grower/distributor
My little brother just suggested we drink the rest of the vodka because it's raining. My job is complete.
You may have cured my horniness. I feel like my libido just got shat on by kittens who live on an enchanted rainbow.
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
Also, I'm sat on the floor drinking cava because life is just not working for me tonight.
Bonded with the ladies at the perfume outlet by saying "help me smell like i'm not hungover before my shift starts". This is not where I wanted my life to be
I'm really sorry I bit your mom last night, it was completely uncalled for.
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
What do you mean you haven’t had the fantasy of getting anally penetrated by a tentacle monster?
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