that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
I am drunk at a castle and it isn't even 3. Europe is amazing.
If I can't pick up a cat lady, I probably need to turn to Internet dating.
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
Here's my first problem: I'm drunk
Look at my fb. It says single. That's the gospel.
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
So because I got upset you didn't answer I threw my phone in the garbage disposal last night
I need drugs. Hard drugs. Today. Not tomorrow. Today. Something relaxing.
His sister gave me the "if you hurt him I will break your neck" talk. I didn't know how to tell her we're not a couple.
I have no idea what happened last night but I sobered up whilst showering with a mop.
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
Randomize
