you kept screaming that dicks were growing out of your back and then you started crying cause they were so far from your vag
could you get any more awkward?
Dude you didn't move for like 2 hours then suddenly sang the chorus to ghetto superstar and passed back out
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
Drag queen told me that I have the cheek bones to do drag. That's supposed to boost my moral.
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
Nothing ends a night of heavy drinking better than banging to three six mafia in your own driveway
Did u smell a guys dreadlocks in the McDonald's drive thru line last night or did I dream that?
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
Trying to do the walk of shame over here WHY are there a hundred ppl on the el?! Thank god I pulled a summit and wore casual clothes I even stopped by the farmers market and bought some squash
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
So, I had a dream last night that involved you as an actual cloaked Captain America and a lot of weird sex, and I didn't hate it.
I want to see a guy holding a pizza and a bottle of scotch and a box of magnums. I'm a simple woman.
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
Shhh embrace your inner whore. Just embrace it.
Randomize
