you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
there is mayo everywhere what the fuckkkk
You rolled out of the car, got on all fours and puked then just nonchalantly stood up and waved goodbye and thanks for the ride.
He went around feeding all the high kids pretzels. He's like their god now
Rule travel - in 2s or put an ankle monitor on me, and maybe a shock collar.
I bought a vibrating wall dildo with my tax return. You?
Also, being stuck with my family all week has made it very clear that I need to be drunk and I need to be fucked pronto
I just spilled a shot of Patron on your mom.. Body shots may be happening. You better get here quick.
I'm way too hungover for life right now
according to the calendar even that i put in my phone last night, i'm supposed to fuck shit up at 11am today... i really hope i didn't miss something important
There's a fuckload of syrup all over the floor.
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
I just shaved my legs via the sink as to not wake my parents up because I know I'll be having marathon sex tomorrow after my certification exam... so this is life after college.
Randomize
