a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
Ok. Also I almost just threw up. Seriously. I was think to myself "really? Here? Now? At my work desk?" and then it went away.
I DON'T CARE WHAT THE CIRCUMSTANCES ARE NEVER VOMIT IN MY PURSE AGAIN.
I managed to fit my wallet, my keys, my phone, Tammy's necklace, and $38.50 all in my bra. and $1.50 is in quarters. go me.
could you please not use my mortar and pestal for its intended purpose? i just snorted cracked black pepper.
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
So do you remember the bartender that caught me when I fell off the bar 4 weeks ago? He hasn't been to work since...Woops.
Are you ok?
They gave me a cat until I fall asleep. His name is fluffy because he's fluffy.
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
Santa tracker drinking game, you in or what?
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
Certain restrictions may apply. Common side effects of sex with me include unbridled joy, a healthy glow, soreness and the inability to walk for short to long amounts of time. If any of these side effects occur please consult your physician, so he/she can prescribe me a "high-five".
You ran up a $300 bar bill on his card and he didn't have you arrested, be grateful and move on.
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
Randomize