if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
My pee smelled like sake this morning it was sooo disgusting.
Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
i just got the best bj of my life in the pastors office at church.. Youre right jesus really does love me.
A lesson I learned in the hospital....when you masturbate while attached to a heart monitor, it scares the nurses a lot.
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
He just told an 8 year old to go fuck himself so we probably won't be in the butterfly exhibit much longer.
If he breaks up with me, your job is to keep me drunk and make sure I don't sleep with anyone. Ok?
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
She wouldn't put out on the first date. I think my boner put a hole in my mattress.
I think my staff loses a little bit of respect for me every time you're in town. I may have to puke at work ...again.
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
Are you vicariously golddigging through me?!
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