I CAN MOONWALK!
i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
watching a tv show about cocaine.. just explained to my mom why the test monkey chose coke over food
the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
I wish they made helmets for livers.
You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
I kept whispering "I love it when you call me big papa" until she got annoyed and left
Congratulations, you fucked a nickle into me.
quick, send me a pic of a fat chick eating ice cream in a bikini. no joke, no questions, just do it.
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
We need to figure out what we are doing for halloween asap. I'm not going out like a punk ass bitch burger king again this year.
See this is where I mess up.. I get distracted by the option of consistent sex and free beer
Finals week game: One shot for every psychological trauma I've been through that I have to explain in detail. Man I hate my major sometimes.
There was nowhere else for me to go. I'm like the island of misfit toys but I'm hot.
Riddle me this: I can stream porn just fine but try and watch my college class and nooo it won't work
Be there in 4 minutes
Randomize
