Jesus can read your poker face... He is not pleased
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
letting you know, as a good neighbor, that when your windows open and your shade is up we can hear and see you dancing naked to money maker... nice boobs
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
The bartender from Thursday remembered me... And gave me a FLAMING BUCKET of alcohol.
Yup, totally tried cooking bacon in the dryer last night.
The night went downhill when he lit her purse on fire and tried putting it out with vodka
I WAS JUST SITTING HERE BEING SNIFFED BY ODD WOMEN FOR A SOLID 5 MINUTES. My face was a twist of utter fear and confusion...
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
This holiday season is going to be rough between people coming home for the holidays and the already regulars on my list I might have to clone my vagina to make sure I get everyone for all they are worth
After we had sex he told me it was a "goodbye gift". We haven't talked since.
Okay, yeah, judgmental guy at 7/11. I'm buying g wine at 10:20 in the morning. You wanna fight about it?
I saw a drunk guy run across the street with an American flag between his buttcheeks.
Did you throw up out the back door and cover it with paper towels?
Randomize
