this crazy girl in up in Dennys is going crazy because Bob Saget just texted her.
Mom's drinking. Just asked her if she was good to walk back to the condo. She seemed unsure until she remembered she brought the GPS. We are 2 blocks from the condo.
There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
I can't. He's too cute and my tongue is too long.
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
I took his sheets with my when I left seeing that I underestimated my period. Also grabbed a 6-pack out of the fridge because breakfast is the most important meal of the day & I don't do other peoples laundry for free.
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
Pizza rolls are incredible. They are like sex, except I have them sometimes
Dude... She just sent me a story of how she wants to fuck me on a boat and call me her captain.. Well ahoy mateys, lets set sail
I mean, he's 40, foreign, artsy but with substance abuse problems and estranged children. How is he not my type?
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
You're doing screenings before you set me up again- no child sized dicks allowed.
Getting so old my power naps are turning into, "can I reasonably just go to bed at this time?"
Randomize
