I don't understand why she insists on me walking her to the door. She came over for literally 8 minutes, we had sex, and now I need her to leave. That fake chivalry will change nothing about the situation.
Tell your sister I'm no fool. Or at least romanticize the notion of the fool.
the ***** family is living proof that there are no more lifeguards in the humen gene pool
exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
he sent me a winky sad face. i cannot deal this level of pathetically needy flirtatiousness.
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
Apparently it's illegal to hit pedestrians with coke cans... But the cop complimented my arm. That's a win in my book.
Seriously I'm dying. All my insides are fighting their way out of me. With light sabers and machetes.
I thought my neighbors locked me out of the building. Then I remembered I was drunk. PUSH AND TURN.
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
About the whale....I wasn't completely awake.
you were shouting "me peeing on him is the closest he'll EVER get to my vagina!"
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
Randomize
