in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
My 40 year old neighbors are throwing a party for their eight year old niece's birthday. It's 1am and they're still partying hard. Harder than me. It's Saturday. Just say it, I'm a disgrace to the generation.
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
You know, he picked a really shitty time to stop sleeping with me to pay attention to his girlfriend.
I don't even want to go. i just want to be a hermit and live in a cave with an elephant that pisses vodka
I gave up. I'm crying over my notes. Oh, ya know, just another drunk finals week
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
So, sleeping with all of my Vicodin in my bra because I knew she'd be searching my room for drugs tonight. I'LL SHOW HER.
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
come home. I need you. I'm too hungover to deal with this hangover alone
Pretty sure we had a civil war reenactment in your kitchen at 4am.
That would explain the cannon.
Not only do I have a well-defined bite mark on my arm, but I also have a perfectly clear bruise of a handprint wrapped around my arm like a tribal tattoo. Thoughts on how that happened?
He made her leave because she liked Top-Ramen better than Maruchaun. He's my hero.
Randomize
