And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
I had to sleep with my math professor to pass algebra. Apparently my blowjobs are only C+ quality
he bit the head off a dead goose for 5 beers. this is my future boyfriend.
I'm sitting by myself in my bra eating a waffle and drinking pineapple rum. gamedaaaayyyyyyy
who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?
I got to masturbate in Rome in a gorgeous hotel room. Don't try and tell me I need a boyfriend
Do you know why I have a burn shaped like a tiny spork?
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
look on the scale of 1 to the time you hit an old lady with your car chlamydia barely even rates
Mixing Powerade and white wine has been one of my better ideas.
Still drunk. lying on the floor just rubbing my cats nipples
I feel fine lol. I tried climbing a tree but the branch broke and I got arrested.
i just woke up in my dog's bed, on my parents floor, my outfit on backwards, and a bottle of lube poured down my pocket.
Randomize
