You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
so it turns out you can rearrange the letters in "scottsdale" to spell "milf city." who knew?
You don't understand, alcohol has become a thing of survival for me and without it I can't function as a normal human being
We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
I sat in the bathroom on the counter and gave out advice to all the random people that walked in
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
John stretched a condom over his face and tried to puke in it.
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
After she lost the bet I made her get on one knee so she could "Te-blow me"
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
Putting all my energy Into finding a polite way to ask my mailman to fuck me in his car.
If she gets mad at me, that only means more free time for me. I like to put myself I win win situations. Despite being in a relationship, I still find ways to accomplish my goals.
I emptied a Vyvance capsule into my coffee pot last night and set the auto start. Pretty sure I've been drinking meth all morning
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
Randomize