I specifically asked you not to be slutty tonight.
idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
The bathroom is trashed. Someone took down all the rings of the shower curtain and Scott threw up on the curtain liner. All the soap and shampoo is in the guest bedroom and the lightbulbs are in a drawer. And there are vom footprints.
While he was going down his phone rang and he answered saying I'll call you later I'm eating.
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
Dude I'm riding a fucking tortoise this is awesome you should come with me more often
New rule for Thursdays: no high gymnastics
I just realized I haven't had a date or a potential possibility of a date in about a year. Then I realized I wanted to actually go on a date. But I'm sitting here getting high instead of being at a party. Life.
You seriously knocked all the beer off the table, broke the beer pong table, broke the bar and kept yelling "you have to warn me first!" all because I wouldn't let you have another four loco
I mean when you laced a shot with $200 worth of cocaine I could see why you'd be mad when somebody drops it
He texts me "just to say hi" and then tells me how hard he is and sends me a dick pic. And I'm like, dude, I'm ordering a burrito right now
this is gentle reminder #1 not to forget to bring the vibrator when you come
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
My fuck it list is complete! I finally got a firefighter!
Randomize
