I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
Baconater + red wine = first meal of the day
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
His ankle bracelet went off in the middle of sex. That makes a girl reevaluate her life...
She wont be able to take it all. I'll use a shoe horn to get it in if I have to.
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
It's the building I live in, they were lucky I was wearing clothes at all
I just smoked weed out of a baked potato.
You rock my world.
I feel like I'm eight miles away and my brain is just now getting here. You got a lot of fucking catching up to do.
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
I'm sitting in the breakroom facing a very large sign that says "inappropriate workplace behaviors", and i can't help but feel like it is directed at me
It'll be a pair of asscheeks that light up when they're summoned.
Sneezing cum all over the table was not the highlight of the family reunion if that tells you anything
When I got home he was in his underpants on the couch, eating pop tarts and crying while watching Voltron.
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
Randomize
