my mother and i just seriously had a convorsation about why you cant Google "Refurbished Dildos"
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
i was gonna tell him a really embarassing story about you, but then i remembered im in all of them
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
guess who has a date tonight
look at you growing up, going on dates before she hops into bed
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
'Well you know, stuff happens' isn't really an excuse for sticking a cheeto in my ear
He is crying over the toilet and his friends just came in and tried to make him take another jello shot.
I can't even remember the last time I took my own pants off
Growing a beard is gonna make smoking a pipe look so much more majestic
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
If you need me I'll be getting drunk in a chewbacca onsie like a real adult.
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
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