I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
Do u have any bacon or vodka by chance
don't go back without me... they'll know i'm pooping.
Remind me to tell you the Scottish bar story tomorrow
Remind me to tell you it was a shitty story when you're done telling it tomorrow
fell asleep with the bong in the pool, weirdest tan line ever
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
Left and drinking by a bar by myself. Everyone is in pajamas. I'm in a tuxedo. This is my life.
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
So apparently I was a completely different person lastnight, one who drinks scotch and makes out with 55 year old men who look like inspector gadget
I'm the only person who goes to break up a friends with benefits and comes out with a boyfriend
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
Somehow my boobs came up in conversation AGAIN last night and I'm still not getting laid...
I woke up in a warehouse with the words “Property of Adam” written on my chest in frosting.
Randomize
