we're blogging at a bar
i mistaked the back of her knee for her vagina
We should be called the Road Head Warriors
She had been watching Bad Girls Club where the annoying girl always says "I RUN L.A.". After she got wasted she kept going up to strangers at the bar yelling "I RUN FAYETTEVILLE." I peed in her drink.
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
No, she passed out instead. I have the worst luck, its like Jesus is mad at me for having the same birthday as him
Every time I get scared about the fact that I'm falling for him I remember that he juggles and is hung like a mastadon and everything is a-ok.
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
the last guy with this job had a bookshelf fall on him. He's in the Er. Im high and they gave me his shift. How do you think i feel?
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
The last thing I remember from that party was me shouting "hold my feet I'm going in strapped like Rambo"
I think I'm leaving the streamers and balloons up from 4th of july till after he stops by. It'll be like the universe is celebrating his massive dick.
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
That awkward moment when you realize you've been secretly blackout dating someone for three months. Drunk me is in a committed relationship.
Randomize