sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
my cup is half full, half full of rum.
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
you can't just make up for the fact that you broke up with me by tagging yourelf in my embarrassing facebook videos of you
THEY'RE. IN. YOUR. BED. THEY RANDOMLY SHOW UP. AND GET IN YOUR BED.
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
Life is my bitch right now. The bouncers tried to carry me out of the club, but everyone thought I was crowd surfing so everyone carried me BACK IN. Winning as fuck.
I miss forts and drugs that made me believe in unicorns...
Just so were clear your wife is cut off from my dick.
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
Grilled cheese and shark week. Unemployment done right.
At least Shia Labeouf would encourage me to do this drinking contest
She wore her engagement ring the whole time we fucked. I hate her fiancee, so it was cool
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
Randomize
