We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
please keep texting me so i can pretend someone likes me
I wish my period boobs were my regular boobs.
Whatever. We're stealing a penguin. Your not allowed near him... You did this to yourself.
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
You kept screaming "Its taco night!" before every shot
After Sake bombs he tried to puke into an alluminum beer bottle and shot vomit streaks in a perfect V out the sides of his mouth and hit BOTH girls he had bought drinks for that night. He was like an Icon of Cock-blocking yourself.
we flagged you as soon as you tried to put the lime in the microwave to prove it was really a kiwi. again.
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
When you wake up, I have a unicorn coloring book, crayons, mini cupcakes, and booze.
She is dumping me if she doesn't get a ring by Valentines. So one more month of free sex and it will be back to the right hand.
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
I bought him flowers and fake vampire fangs, cuz there's really not a greeting card that says "Sorry I got wasted last night and started a very sloppy bloodletting ritual.".
Randomize
