There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
I'm not sure where but someone shit somewhere in the house
It was like a lincoln log. Seriously. I don't know who's more pissed, me or my vagina...worst.hookup.ever.
i'm glad we're now at the level of friendship where we can comfortably discuss the quality of our shit
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
We just ended up getting drunk and doing field sobriety tests on each for practice... No one remembers who passed.
Ice cream: Good. Fraternity: Good. Eating ice cream off a Skid Row bum's ass crack in order to get into a Fraternity: Homoerotic at best. I quit.
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
your life is going to be an empowering working mom montage tomorrow to Katy P's ROAR... --are you living in a yoplaít comercial?
He's a real gentleman. At least he tried to flush my closet's handle after he pissed in it.
This morning, I found 5 naked people in Steve's bed with post sex hair, and Steve fully clothed sleeping on the ground.
This is like the fourth time this month I've woken up hungover in someone's backyard
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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