YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
Its the anniversary of our epic NBA All-star game weekend. The night the two of us cashed a 30-pack while watching the dunk contest
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
Need to spend sober time with him while fully clothed. I can't decide if he's a seriously amazing man or a complete fucking dickbag.
This is me not judging you for what a fine line you draw between the two.
I have a hook up buddy in Abiquiu. He lives next to a Chipotle; that's the only reason I see him.
I'm at that point in my life where keeping an extra pair of underwear in my purse is normal.
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
Just keep your throat open and beer will always find its way in.
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
I'd just like to take a moment now to apologize sincerely for getting drunk and making an as of myself at your Christmas party next week. I'm especially sorry for sleeping with your baby sister.
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
OMG also, I'm sorry I tased you a lil
Randomize
