Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
I got date raped at Sigma Chi last night!
Dude, you never made it to Chi last night. You fell into a tree and passed out.
Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
i swear to god her finding her clit was like looking for a sock in a dryer full of beach towels
once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
Some dude at the gas station right now is buying a 30 rack of beast and a can of cat food. Happy Thanksgiving.
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
Is it sad that I woke up to more "Happy Holidays" texts on 4/20 than I did on Christmas?
I'm drinking wine alone, eating leftovers, and cleaning my sex toys. For the love of god, do not graduate.
Every girl my sister has brought home from college I've had sex with, check and mate motherfucker
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
Ok. I'm gonna smoke some weed and look at some elephants without you then.
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
It's like everybody loves Raymond but the total opposite and everyone wants him to die
Randomize
