Call me Kermit cause I'm about to go piggin
He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
today is the best snowday of my entire life. also its no shirt day.
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
please just be careful, i just switched my facebook status to "in a relationship", i would look really pathetic if i had to change it back to "single" already
I knew it was time to leave Waffle House when you started singing "What's Your Fantasy" to your hash browns.
and he should realize what an amazing ex i am for encouraging my best friend to hook up with him
Dude. It's not even nine. I don't know yet.
Drink number four. Don't even tell me about its not even nine
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
thank you for being a reason not to completely check out of my life and start sleeping all day, crying all night, and living off vodka acquired through credit card debt
I emailed the police apartment to apologize to the officer from last night. I practically threw a hissy fit because he wouldn't hug me.
It was "against protocol"
So apparently I initiate sex in my sleep
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"
(919) the date's not going well. He's on his phone talking about his eBay amine shit...
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