so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
im sitting in my room wearing my power rangers shirt watching a movie about a magical dragon. Ive totally forgotten what having a sex life is like.
At what point did I eat out of your mouth?
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
I don't know what's worse: going to the liquor store at 9am or knowing that its open at 9am
fact: I now appreciate my drunken winter self even more. I just found $20 in my winter coat with a note that says keep yourself warm next winter. I am awesome.
after the shots you kept on yelling "this is for the dreamers"
Here's the level of my committment: I'm not participating in the Olympic opening ceremonies drinking game. THIS IS SERIOUS.
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
And that facial hair. He might as well shave it so it spells "douche" on one cheek and "nozzle" on the other.
I stopped hooking up with him and ran to the bathroom to throw up. He saw me throwing up and it made him throw up
Probably gonna run and pray I throw up. Then go get a coffee/bagel & continue to rally
I just had a guy ask me if his "jewelry downstairs" would set off the metal detector.
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
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