do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
Hallmark should totally make "congratulations on getting your period" cards...I feel they would be quite popular.
I just farted for five sidewalk sections! New personal best.
you were sitting on the floor cleaning up your own puke and telling my mom she should hire you as a maid.
Yo dude either Brian has herpes or he was jerking off to Web MD 'cause I just walked in on him
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
She bit a glass in half.
You will receive a large, large reward, worth much more than the actual phone you are holding, paid not only in cash but in sexual favors, if you return this phone! Please respond if you're interested in cash/sex/or just being a good person. Thanks and hope to hear from you soon!
I crawled out his bedroom window, forgetting he lives in a split level and there is a 10 foot drop back there. I had to text him to come help me I twisted my ankle.
I know of an excellent nanny. A lot like Mary Poppins but way cooler. And likes pot.
When in doubt, it's too much cheese
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
So this is how i'm celebrating Easter? By eating chicken nuggets and masturbating all day. What a life.
ps. i have two very important words to sum up my night
which are?
library sex.
Randomize
