office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
I wish Facebook had filters like: Ivy League school, frat boy, straight, extremely wealthy, great in bed.. I would check all of them
I'm scared. I feel like she's my mom and she just walked in on me having sex. Like she's "disappointed"
I can practically hear my vag and my conscience fighting.
Every time I remember you're bi, the world gets a little brighter.
So I passed out with my boxers on in the hotel jacuzzi at 5am.. The manager who kicked me out was pretty cute so I left my name and number for her at the front desk. I'm giving it a 50/50 she calls.
I think the multiple Sunday morning sirens outside my window are a plot by the cops to get back at me for the shit we pulled last night. Or I should move to a better area.
So this tall girl jumped in our cab and I was like hey I have pics of u on my phone. It wasn't creepy at all
Anywho, an ostrich attacked me today. Fucking useless pieces of shit birds.
I'm so cold without your freakishly high body temperature
that's the equivalent to a normal girlfriends. 'I miss you' btw
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
It's just not St. Patrick's Day until someone pukes on your panties.
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
Showed up to pick her up in my boxers. Lets just say im 2 for 2 with this new idea
Randomize
