tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
hey what are you doing
hooking up with some marlborough girl. shes gorgeous!
i texted you because i like you, and i told my freinds you were my fiance. but sine we're not dating you're not cheating and i'm pathetic
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
Btw I don't have words to express my appreciation at how many times you've had to be on a dirty bar bathroom floor for me in the past two weeks
It's amazing
I want to run hundreds of miles and do a whole semesters worth of homework while flying on a unicorn and throwing endless glitter bombs
I LIKE NICE BOXERS OKAY!? COMBINED WITH A GLORIOUS DICK JUST MAKES THIS EVEN BETTER. WE MOVE IN TOGETHER AND THAT PIC'S GETTIN FUCKING FRAMED.
He found a way to charmingly ask me for a threesome and when I said no he made it sound like he was even happier. He's a fucking wizard
I haven't even had my coffee yet and you're being slutastic
Why is there a slipper full of piss in my bedroom?
I'm beginning a new chapter of my life in which our fridge will always be stocked with jello shots. I'm excited to embark down this road to fruity, semi-solid alcoholism.
Drink water, eat food, and stop tazing yourself
Rock bottom: having sex rejected while your boyfriend talks in his sleep as you stuff your face with Girl Scout cookies
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
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