is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
Just saw a bouncer shoot a stripper with a squirt gun. He looked at me n said,"gotta keep em in check." I'm in love with this place
You said your dick dragged you up the stairs
If theres one good thing that came out of our relationship its this chicken recipe. And squirting.
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
Okay, who took a picture of their pubes shaved into a dragon on my phone and made it the background?!
We haven't said piping hot jizz in awhile... that needs to come back into our conversations
I'm so hungover I literally am considering drinking from the fishtank to avoid getting out of bed.
She walked home carrying a six pack of beer and someone elses cat
SHE BETTER HAVE BROUGHT BACK MY FUCKING COUCH CUSIONS OR SHES GUNNA GET IT.
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
Our drunk hook up was interrupted by the delivery guy. When he came back to my room we ate the gyros and went back to sex like we didn't take a lunch break.
I feel like we'd have a lot of fun being drunk at a dog show.
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
Randomize
