I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.
We're smoking a joint the size of the average penis right now. I may not survive.
I loved your drunken rendition of "I wanna dance with somebody" that you left on my voicemail last night.
YOU GOT KINKY WEIRD ICE CREAM HEAD ON FRIDAY DONT EVEN COMPLAIN.
I took in his dog. My exboyfriend still calls me for 2 things, blow jobs and animal rescue. I need to end this cycle
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
I heard that clinking noise from behind me and I already knew you were whipping out a Smirnoff in class. Again.
Thanks for taking care of me. I hope I didn't pee in your car.
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
He sent me nudes and then a text asking if I tried the new Cantina Bowl from Taco Bell. He sure does romance right, doesn't he?
i swear i was one second from getting his number and then the shrooms kicked in
nobody put me to bed and I ended up peeing on a tree and got written up
she grabed my junk and started making lightsaber noises
I wonder if you could get her in a metal bikini
Randomize
