This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
There are just some things I refuse to put in my mouth.
Apparently I farted on her in my sleep. Then, just to be sure she was cool, I did it again on purpose and she didnt say anything. So, WIN?
i'm sober ask me anything about the civil war
Not gonna lie i was comfortable between the allsups air conditioners while you were talking to the cop.
Her mom offered to give me a lap dance. I was a guest, I couldn't say no.
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
I threw up in the shower, slipped, and fell in it. Should I try and continue my day or just get back in bed?
Your boyfriend and I are bonding over your giant dick.
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
The part of "Dave" will now be played by "Rob." Rob, why don't you unzip and show Dave why that is.
He apologized for cumming on my leg, but not for ghosting me for 3 weeks before :(
On a brief change if topic, last night I dreamt I got shit faced with bill Nye the science guy and we went bar to bar and explained the science of alcohol to everyone who'd give us free drinks. We wore bow ties
Thanks for ruining my life with your man penis
Randomize