My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
Then he complimented me on how excellent I was at breathing through my nose
in my drunkeness I still was able to plan for the morning. I duck taped my keys, a water bottle full of mimosa and my cell phone to the front door.
You then proceeded to tell me how good of a cook you were and put raw cookie dough in the champagne.
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
I know. I told you I'm a mess. She had weird nipples. I almost lost an eye to one.
Hahahaaa There's this one girl crying hysterically and wrapped around (i believe) her ex's leg. He's trying to shake her off without spilling his beer. This is fucking priceless.
Taking shots of gin by myself out of TMNT glasses and chasing with bites of chocolate cake. AMERICA.
Beer and tomahawks! Not gonna end well!
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
If the smell of things stopped me from putting things in my mouth. I wouldn't be popular with Grindr guys.
I wasn't that gone.
Dude, you cried and said how sorry you were when we asked why you had the dip.
Just broke into the basement of my house via my american red cross blood donor card. I officially save lives
IM HAMMERED AND JUST HAD CHEESECAKE THAT MADE ME FEEL LIKE NO MAN HAS EVER MADE BE FEEL BEFORE.
Randomize
