then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
if you google earth my address you can see me getting out of my car. finally my moment of being famous
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
just explained the breakup in detail to my big toes. that consolation brownie was Amazing.
I want to apologize in advance for texting you a picture of my penis tonight.
Who is he, asking me if im dtf without a question mark
...
"Bring the kids" is the most terrifying 3 words I've ever heard in my life.
Lesson of the night: never take shots out of a bottle you found under a couch in a frat house. I have no idea where I am
She sent pictures and the names of her 2 cats and her dog and told me that I should be happy to have met the whole family.
You must be good in bed dude
What do you want to swallow. Press 1 whiskey press 2 rum
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
Lube filled water balloons always make for a good time
I forgot about snapchatting a pic of us, but I remember flossing with your hair.
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
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