Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
I wish we never smoked. I'm literally laying in bed opening and closing my eyes, just hoping a hot dog stand will appear in the room.
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
My parents called me out on catching us walking home from the bar in a swimming motion because "it was too windy to walk" home...
Me and this 7 year old almost finished a large pizza. And when I say me and this 7 year old I really mean me.
I shaved my pussy for you. If you complain about a single hair that I missed again, you will be greeted by a bush the next time you go down on me and i will MAKE YOU KEEP GOING
Inebriation Olympics: Team Drunk vs Team Stoned. This weekend. It's on.
Never underestimate the power of loudly proclaiming you want to make out with someone
I just realized how terrible that was... I was drumming on your penis to a song about Baby Jesus.
Nows a good time to tell him. Just be like "yeah, I used to bang her too and it didn't work out for us either". He'll understand.
Randomize
