It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
Seriously... There's something wrong here. I'm drinking vodka to mask the smell of chocolate on my breath before I get home and he finds out. I fucking hate couple dieting...
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
Not a chance. She stuck her hand under my kilt and she told the whole table I was indeed commando. She broke all the rules.
Right, well, that begs the question of where did you get the whip, why are you using it, and why don't you carry one around more often?
Mass text to all of my back up boy toys. First one here wins. Mama needs some.
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
Is it bad that I don't ask for names anymore? Just added "gold-chain-wearing hotel guy" to my list under "minivan 3way" and "funny-tasting gym guy."
If I come back tomorrow to find a certain football player tied up and locked in your closet, shit's gonna get real.
I'll set him free tomorrow morning ;)
I am honestly trying to remember his name. All I can remember is that he had a weird mole, a daughter and a lot of cocaine. Please stop letting me pick up at gay night.
Stop your judging. I got free booze AND an oil change. You're the one whose always saying we're spending too much money.
strip teases shouldnt end with an expensive car covered in salsa and mayonnaise yet here we are
You're right. Cause really... I'm in the back of his head. Even though what I said was better than "I have herpes"... I did once say that to him. So I'm like a reoccurring nightmare.
Did I honestly think it was a good idea to wear my pink robe out in public at 2 in the morning ?
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