you're like a bully in the Christmas story
just chased whiskey with a pickle. i definitely recommend it
Best friends brother. Beat that.
We've been fucking since Friday.... This is the most committed non-committed relationship I've ever been in
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
i know im back at school when i can poke any random spot on my body and expect a 80% chance that theres a bruise there
Just think about how many life skills I lack. Cooking... Driving... Sobriety...
You would think that someone would have been sober enough to object to vodka bong races.
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
Sharknado 3 is going to bring us to alcoghol poisonign
Do not tell me I cant do drunk math ever again, AND I made a creative way of telling him I want him to fuck me.
Jesus fucking Mary Christ if I have to clean shit out of my fucking bathtub one more fucking time I'm gonna murder a fucking kitten
Randomize
