hey call me
can't. in the shower.
... and this is probably why your phone does not work half the time.
i got us presents. or arrested. we shall see!
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
Yeah, well I just made $600 while taking a shut cause two diff clients called while I was in here. Tell me being a lawyer doesn't kick ass.
wow, you never really realize how many muscles you have in your crotch until you pull them all.
My drunk neighbor is arguing with a goose in his yard. This was the highlight of my day.
I JUST ATE A STRANGE BURRITO, I SHOULD NOT BE EXPECTED TO KNOW ANYTHING RIGHT NOW.
I decided not to eat, and then this man was my fairy " don't black out" godmother
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
If you've never been partying there before, take Shae with you. Drunk Shae is like a GPS. She found us the only bottle shop still open at four, a pot dealer, and told us all which subway to take to get home. She'd never been to Madrid before. It was awesome.
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
It was an entirely appropriate time and place for sexual thoughts.
That doesn't make it ok to play by play me your honeymoon!
I just ran into my psychology professor at Planned Parenthood she asked why I was there and I asked why she was there and it turns out we both had a scare.#bonding because of abortion.
Randomize
