Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
She described it as "a squirrel being hit by a hurricane"
SOME GIRL ON THE STAIRS IN FRONT OF ME JUST FARTED AND IT WENT STRAIGHT INTO MY MOUTH!
I understand why you refuse to be sober now
These fall allergies are really hindering my cocaine habit.
they arrested me when i was peaking, i'm pretty sure they were specifically looking for me but i was too busy rolling around, loving the grass to notice the police car..
Sitting in a bubble bath with my bong, how's your morning?
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
Doing a circuit workout and using a power hour playlist for my 1 minute timers. I am getting old. creative, but old.
How did work go after you told them you were in jail?
Great they tried to bail me out.
Fire trucks are here again. It wasn't me this time.
The squirrels were at the front door. Dude I swear..
Do you not realize that being Batman fulfills about 95% of my non-sexual fantasies?
there's fucking coffee grinds packed all inside my pipe. what did i do
Randomize
