My life would be so much easier if i could just ride around in the cash cab all day
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
I have no valid justification for peeing in your kitchen, but I don't think it's worth breaking up over.
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
I heard you were walking home with taylor with your dress completely up and your ass exposed
Yeah, that sounds like my life.
I NEED YOU HERE TO KNOCK THE MALT BEVERAGES OUT OF MY MOUTH
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
I can't bring an entire liter in the bar in my purse. I mean I can. I might. I'm probably gonna.
You get home ok?
Uh, you stopped by my house at 4 am and woke me up, so yeah.
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
My mom just offered to be my designated driver tonight. I love being an adult.
I think we have it figured out.. She's my wife when she's here and gives me advise on how to get ass when she's 1500 miles away.
My sex toys have been held in customs for almost a month now. They're British, what the hell?!?
Randomize
