so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
morning outfit: hottub soaked skirt. no underwear. someone's bandanna worn as a shirt. took me an hour to walk home. this isn't fun anymore.
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
As hard as i've been partying lately their gonna have to revoke my organ donor status
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
I did not appreciate your texts about spanking at 3'o'clock this morning.
holy shit the woman im hooking up with is closer to my moms age than my own
Don't need my thirties to be known as the decade of "new types of shits from drinking" like last night.
I barfed on the cat last night. Just wanted to share.
Do you know anyone else that comes home with unexplainable injuries as many nights a week as we do?
theres a canoe in our lawn. we dont own a canoe.
it was the only safe place
I have jizz, in my hair. I'm sitting in class with jizz. In. My. Hair. I need to make better life choices.
He went down on me while I was on the phone with my grandma.
Randomize
