I am sleeping on the floor in your room so if you have sex in here just don't roll on me
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
Walked in on my boss having phone sex at work... and somehow this didnt bother nor embaress him
Sometimes familiar penis is best. Its like comfort food for your vagina.
You have to keep an eye on her tonight cause you know how she likes to pickpocket people when she's drunk.
He's going to let me keep his bowl in my car. Does that make us Facebook official?
I'm gonna give him birthday punches. On the dick. With my mouth.
Remember last time I drank with my mom? I asked if I got my dick sucking abilities from her.
Apparently, the right response to, "How do you feel about a terrorist being in the area?" isn't, "Well, we have vodka in the freezer, so we're good for now."
Why wake up next to a guy when you can wake up next to a bag of chips and not have to worry about what kind of std you might've caught
I just drove my booty call to his booty call, if that isn't spreading the love, I don't know what is.
I love waking up to reeses ice cream. But I DONT love waking up to it all over my cat. I blame you.
I was pretty sure he wouldn't be into me after I fucked his brother, and then his best friend, and yet, here I am doing lines off his stomach
Randomize
