we're blogging at a bar
She just dipped a dollar bill in her queso dip and almost ate it before I slapped it out of her hand, no more bar crawls..
Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
Just found a quarter that has been stuck to my boob since at least last night.
Hey just to warn you theres a really fat guy passed out in front of our front door snoring. Don't touch him, he's in god's hands now.
shattered his nose in 8 pieces. Blaming it on the dog. I feel more guilty about ruining the dog's good name than I do about ruining his nose.
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
Drink for every country you've never heard of.
Fuuuuuuuuuck
Oh and apparently Friday night I came home and tried assembling the Christmas tree until my mom just told me to go to bed. Blackout.
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
Fire trucks are here again. It wasn't me this time.
His dick isn't even good enough to be this much of an asshole
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