I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
i just heard my neighbor say from outside my window "i don't give a shit what he does, what the hell am i gonna do with my son's penis?"
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
Yeah i knew he wasn't okay when he told me he was "seeing his vision"
Only I would come home from a random banging with beer and watermelon
I received a letter in the mail from my ex equipped with a used condom,dirt, some hair, and a nude portrait of myself.
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
Happy anniversary, did you sign and mail in the divorce papers yet?
Sent him a nude and I forgot to crop out the Jesus picture in the background. The Catholic guilt is too real.
What? I'll do just about anything if you give me a sticker.
I wanted to give everyone gifts as they left the house... So when your wondering where most of the christmas ornaments are I'm really sorry.
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
Randomize
