Almost ran you over in the parking lot. You look good
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
You must have had one hell of a time explaining to that girl why aladin soundtrack was playing on repeat in your room when you got back
Gentleman, we have a new medal category - number of women per day in apartment WITHOUT FURNITURE
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
we bribed her with croutons and jello shots.
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
Depending on which video of him streaking you watch, you can see me passed out in the front row.
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
I'm literally spending $165 to fly to Arizona to have a sex road trip coming back
Am I under any obligation to let my new fuck buddy know I slept with his little sister?
There are some people who should not be trusted with a cell phone while drunk. You know your one of them when you call the cops on your own party.
i was watching the elves fighting on my knees while waiting for the shrooms to kick in then i realized
Randomize
