whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
My hand turned me down
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
All I know is for some reason I was sitting naked in the hallway playing an invisible ukulele singing somewhere over the rainbow. I wonder why security came.
it's kinda bad that we're already planning travel arrangements to his funeral
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
So neither of us had a dollar bill and we couldnt find a straw so we spent all nite doing coke through penne pasta
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
2 girls slept in my bed with me. 3 more girls slept on a mattress on my floor. The furthest I got was cuddling. Here's my man card.
You get home okay?
I'm pantless and in bed
That doesn't mean you're at home.
Omg have I shown you my skeezy ex fiancée?
The other one.
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
Slap a cop in the butt for a felony charge. Check.
First post college job and I got fired within a week. Something tells me that adulthood isn't going to be as much fun as sex and the city led me to believe.
I realize ur driving andwont read this til u stop, but I'm sleeping in the bed of the pickup. Please don't hit a deer.
Randomize
