I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
That explains waking up with one hand in the toilet and the other in the trash can
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
I positioned my bed perfectly so around 10 a.m. every morning there are rays of sunshine coming through the window in my room. Now i can tan while PTFO.
Tonight will be judged a success if I walk out without having thrown up on my shirt.
Teenager with grandparents staying in their room: is to blue balls, as parent waiting for teen to come home safe: is to sleep. You will live- love mom
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
When I go out tonight I need to make sure to be really good. The Easter bunny doesn't deliver to jail
This is why we can never be together. Well that and we r married to other ppl but that's very minor detail compared to the coffee issue
I need to just embrace dildos and cats and call it a life.
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
Man I sound like a slutty Mormon
Someone just needs to roll me into a blanket burrito and feed me drugs
I'm so stoned. We're making Josh's sister bake us brownies. She's so small and pixie like. Her brownies make me cry tears of happy.
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