I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
I woke up this morning and thought "Im sure I've seen this house in a porno" and instantly googlemapped myself
she smelled like a LAN party
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
remember earlier when I said I was over sex with random boys? take it back take it back take it back
I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I?
you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
He stood me up and then his cat died. I feel like this is Gods way of saying he's on my side, even after the tequila fiasco.
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
We're going as conductors of the hot mess train and nobody rides for free
Our tip jar will say "just put the tip in, see how it feels"
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
All I did was call him a fucker when he took my pot. He didn't have to arrest me.
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