Please tell me you did not just serenade her with "Let's Get it On"?
Yeah I think it worked. My penis thanks you, Captain Morgan.
So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
I have had more skin than food in my mouth the last three days
I woke up to the sound of gentle rain, only to realize I was laying under a urine trough in the men's restroom. Fuck you, bourbon. Fuck you.
I don't give a damn about what he wants to do with his life. Personalities are for pussies.
I feel like we should actually go to church one of these days to thank god for saving us from herpes and babies.
He should be castrated
Nah he might accidentally come while they're cutting it off. Wouldn't be fair to the surgeons
That's why you bone lesbian cage fighters and 45 year olds. To make life less boring.
7:26 bus just came. I am sweatier than Louie Anderson eating chili in a sauna
Wow I got tittyfucked by the American Dream
I smell like cotton candy and guilt.
Not only is he funny, he had a REALLY big dick
He's old enough to be your father!
REALLY. BIG. DICK.
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