Is it normal to miss your booty call?
how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
I wish my mouth had a period so that could be my excuse on those days I don't feel like giving head
Alright this has to stop. Without adderall I don't even have the motivation to get laid. College has ruined me.
i literally paused in the middle of it, turned on my light, pointed to the picture netxt to my bed and go "you hooked up with my roommate too!!! AWWW!" he was so weirded out. i don't think he understands the relationship we have..we share..
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
I saw your relationship status and wanted to write "Now you can fuck with some peace of mind that she isn't giving that other guy she met online a handjob."
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
I rolled joints beforehand. Lit a candle. Ghetto rigged taping the 40's on my hands and then lit the joint using the flame of the candle.
I'm so proud of your modern ingenuity
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
After a crazy night, morning sex is just trying to find a position where you can thrust without getting seasick.
Let's be honest, college orientation is going to be "here's how to drink everclear"
Happy 4 year arrest-aversary! I promise no thanksgiving has been as eventful as that one haha..
Pregaming at Jodi's. Ten minutes
Thought it was at Brad's?
Pregaming the pregame. Need alcohol before I can see that dick.
You cannot ask her to resend the picture of her genital tattoo to you just so you can show your room mate. it is time to end your relationship with the Captain.
Randomize